Why does everyone else feel so wrong?

So me and my boyfriend of nearly a year broke up a month ago. I still love him sooo much. And think about him ALL the time. I still want him SO bad. And i cry so much! Even though we are over; we still talk and are friends. Sometimes he says things that make me think we still have a chance; and then other times he cant even say he misses me too or loves me too. I dont know wut to do. Why does even THINKING bout being in someone elses arms make me wanna puke? It feels so wrong. I wanna be in my babys arms. :( i want no one BUT him. I cant even think bout bein with someone else cuz it makes me sick. It honestly DOES NOT feel right. Why is this so hard for me when he seems so fine? Or is he just hiding it? I hate this heartbroken feeling; and the emptyness; and the tears; i just wan one chance to prove to him that we CAN make it. :( Whys this so hard?